Wednesday, May 31

Top 5 Crappy things about Locking your Tank Keys in the Tank

A stream of consciousness post.

1. Coat Hangers just won't get that sucker open.
2. Did I remember to put the E-brake on?
3. I totally left my I-pod in there. And I just finished my WW3 mix.
4. Did anyone bring the sandwiches out from the cooler in the back?
5. KEVIN!!

Saturday, May 27

Top five things I can hear at work right now

1) "Indie Pop Rocks" on Soma FM playing on my computer
2) The riviting being done on the airplane
3) The two old farts behind my cubicle, talking about the old days of aviation
4) The airplane running up outside the hangar
5) The sound of my tummy growling, I missed lunch:(

Friday, May 26

Top 5 Skirts in my Wardrobe

1. The just-past-knee-length wool, checkered brown/blue/etc. one.
2. The just-past-knee-length burgundy one with the sparkled lace at the bottom.
3. The just-past-knee-length khaki green one.
4. The all-the-way-to-my-ankles orangish/brownish courdoroy one.
5. The knee-length hot red one.

Thursday, May 25

Top Five Hot Disney Cartoon Girls

5. Snow White

4. Pocahontas

3. Cinderella

2. Ariel

1. Belle

Top 5 Things a Slug might Say

1. "I feel slower than usual today. I mean, I know I'm slow, but today just feels really slow."
2. "I love the way that female slug's slime reflects in the sunlight."
3. "Don't flip over . . . Don't flip over . . . Don't flip over."
4. "Seriously guys, drinking is really bad for your health. Seriously."
5. "Man, I'm totally slime trailing right now. This is embarrasing."

Wednesday, May 24

Top 5 Comments from the weekend

1. "What page is that on?" (from a junior high girl who just started coming out to youth - i had just handed her a bible so that she could read the passage the speaker was preaching from...john 10:10 or something....soooo cute)
2. "If you pray for us, maybe it will work better" (two senior high girls who came together for me to pray for them because if i prayed maybe "it" - "it" being their christianity - would work better)
3. "Why don't you ever speak at youth? We always hear about his (pointing to my husband the pastor) life, but we never get to hear about you! We want you to speak." (hehe, i liked this one...only because it came from the junior high girls in the group)
4. "And guys, I'm not just talking about double chocoalte cake. I'm talking about strawberry shortcake. And lemon mirangue pie. And black forest cake...etc." (you just had to be there to get this one. soooooo good!)
5. A conversation between the bus driver/leader and a junior high girl:
Girl: Can I go get some ice cream? (as we are on our one pit stop on the way home that was supposed to be 5 minutes and ended up taking like an hour)
Leader: Well....
Girl: Please!
Leader: What kind of ice cream? (
because in a moment like this, it all hangs on what her answer is)
Girl: Cappuccino chocolate (or something to that extent)
Leader: Well, I guess so. (Thinking: it's a good thing she didn't say strawberry swirl or else she wouldn't have been able to go...good choice girl)
Girl: Thanks
Leader: Just make sure when you bring it on that nobody sees. Pretend you just had it with you all the time (yes, because it wouldn't have melted in the past hour and a half that we had been driving on a sweaty, hot bus).

That was the best. We laughed at him so much after this. And because of the ice cream, the girl had to hold us up while she went to the washroom for the second time during that pit stop. After everyone had finally finished she had to go once again. Oh girls!

Top 5 "Crisis" Moments from YC 2006

1. It all began with a freakout on the bus as we went to pray around the coliseum the night before HM began. A girl (who it turned out was having demonic dreams) wanted nothing to do with us praying against satanic forces. Scary stuff, especially for those sheltered junior high kids.
2. Right after the prayer time, one girl began to have stomach pains so severe that she could barely stand up. We thought it was appendicitis and rushed her to the hospital where we stayed until 2:30am (and then decided to go home for the night because she would not be seen by a doctor for at least 2 more hours...we figured we could just come back again after some sleep if it was that bad)
3. The next afternoon two junior high girls witnessed a domestic fight between two druggies in the park. It wouldn't have been so bad except that they went to the washroom to hide. The women then came to the washroom to lock herself into a stall and the man followed her in, screaming and banging on the doors trying to get into where the women was. The two girls ran out of there completely shaken up and freaked out.
4. Then there was the time after the first night service where me and another leader spent what seemed like forever pretty much in warfare over this girl who had revealed to us all this deep stuff in her life. It got so intense and we had to call over the two pastors because we just didn't know what to do. So much intenseness that night...I can't even describe it.
5. And while this was happening, another girl was being rushed to the hospital because she was having intense stomach pains and on the floor crying (she was the second of i think 4 girls who all went through the same thing, though we stopped going to the hospital after this one). She was there until late into the night. Oh, and this was the same night my husband sprained his ankle so bad that he could barely walk and had to limp around. So yeah.
And that was all within the first 24 hours. Thankfully, a joint emergency prayer meeting turned things around and the rest of the weeknd pretty much went off without a hitch.

Top 5 Moments from Youth Convention 2006

1. Combover Sunday
3. Dance competetion
4. Realizing that 7 minute long videos don't work
5. Realizing that giving 30 minutes of pure energy is a difficult endeavour indeed.

Wednesday, May 17

Top 5 Bear related comments from my mom

1. After asking her what she was doing for mother's day, she replied "Skinning a Bear"
(of course! What else would a woman want to do on mother's day?)

2. When I asked her why, she said incredulously "Because I shot one yesterday, my first bear ever!"
(imagine frightningly excited mom voice here)

3. "I'm going to have a rug made out of it, but I think that we'll leave off the head because we want to put it on the couch"

4. "I got it right in the lung!"

5. "We didn't keep the meat. It creeps me out to eat anything with paws, its like eating a kitten or something"
(Yes, eating is the only part of this situation that creeps her out. Would she shoot a kitten in the lung?)

Top 5 Reasons Being an Oilers fan is finally a good thing:

1. They're going to the conference finals!!!
2. They're going to the conference finals!!!
3. They're going to the conference finals!!!
4. They're going to the conference finals!!!
5 They're going to the conference finals!!!

Let me summarize: They're going to the conference finals!!!

Top five Mr. Sketch felt smells...

If I could make this a "scratch and sniff" post, I would...
1) Purple (Grape)
2) Red (Cherry)
3) Magenta (Raspberry)
4) Orange (Orange)
5) Blue (Blueberry)

Top 5 Things I Realized Today

1. It is harder to ask a question than to make a reflective statement every time. This is because of the control element, but I am a firm believer that relinquishing my control actually enables the other person. It is a beautiful thing really. anyway...
2. Ben Folds wrote Jesusland while riding a train. The beat, the touring lyrics. It is obvious really. yeah...
3. I really love a lot of things about myself, but I am concerned that I don't/can't/am not able to show them. Maybe this is sad. but...
4. Reestablishing an old relationship may be the most courageous and heroic thing I have done all year. ...
5. I still love Ben Kweller. hehe...

Tuesday, May 16

Top 5 Items in my Line of Sight

1. Kleenex box
2. Really old label printer
3. Postcard
4. Old pay stub
5. Pen

Top 5 Moments from Last Week's trip (May 10-14)

You can expect a few of these lists over the Summer.

1. A late night row with a guy in Salmon Arm. Could have been romantic, if it wasn't two guys in a leaky rowboat.
2. Setting up a tent in front of the Kamloops hockey arena. It was windy and cold.
3. Going 109 in a 60 zone (apparently).
4. Outdoor movie in someone's backyard. It was freezing cold. Sooooo cold.
5. Going to one of the most beautiful, and one of the most tear filled (not for me, just everyone involved) weddings of all time.

Top 5 Personal Favourite Muppets:

1. Animal: Seriously, who doesn't love this insane little gaffer?
2. Rowlf: He plays piano and is a poet. I can identify with this little gaffer...minus playing the piano, cause I don't do that very well. And I'm not a dog...or a muppet. Okay, maybe I don't identify with him.
3. Beaker: I love it when he gets blown up. Poor little gaffer.
4. Fozzy: My jokes suck as much as his does. He is not a very funny little gaffer.
5. Kermit: It's not easy being green...or having relations with a pig...or being naked a good 95% of the time...okay, so he's a disturbed little gaffer.

Top 5 Places I Want To Go To When the "Man" Lets Me Leave the Country

1. Disney land: It always looks so magical on TV.
2. Ireland: All I can picture when I think of this place is green...kind of like the emerald city...
3. Europe: All of it. On foot. Maybe with a backpack.
4. Africa: and all I will sing while I am there is Toto.
5. All over the freaking world: Preferably headlining my own big budget, high impact, rock opera tour.

Awwwwwww snap. I'm back.

Monday, May 15

Top 5 Summer Aspirations

1. To eat as much fresh fruit as possible. I live in the Okanagan valley - kinda like the fruit capital of Canada. You just gotta eat fresh fruit.
2. To swim in the lake at least 3x per week. And one of those has to be an evening swim. There's nothing quite like an after dinner dip.
3. To go camping hopefully at least twice a month. Even if it just means driving to a local campground, parking the vw bus and crashing for the night. Even that is well worth the effort in my books.
4. To go and see Wilco (yay, tickets are even booked) and enjoy a well deserved vacation with my hubby.
5. To sit out on the deck in the evening sun, drinking tea, eating chocolate and enjoying a good book (or fellowship with friends) almost every single day. Ah, I am starting to enjoy Kelowna a whole lot more.

Sunday, May 14

Top 5 Things I Have Recently Participated In That Are Unmistakably Burns Lake

1. The Mud Ball - A community dance held at the curling rink. So named because it is usually muddy here this time of year-not so this year. I can't even begin to describe the spectacle in this forum. Astounding.
2. A walk from my house to "the 1st campsite" to skip stones. Actually called The Mclure Pit Recreational Campground, I think. On this over 3km round trip 4 vehicles drove past me. All 4 drivers waved. I knew not even 1 of them.
3. Relative Flirting - I had forgotten about this phenomenon and fear I may have accidentally partaken. This is when a family member comes to talk to you to see if you are suitable for, or interested in, their relative. It is expected, but I had forgotten about it. You see, most everyone knows who is related to who, so it is supposedly just as obvious as the person actually talking to you themself. I'm a little rusty and think I might have flirted back to this guy's sister. We'll see.
4. Bear Relay - When you see a bear, you let the person whose house you saw it near know, giving them the heads-up. This can be done by phone or in person. They then call, or visit, their neighbours to make sure everyone knows. Because noone wants it to get to the point where they have to kill the bear. And noone wants to be killed by the bear.
5. A Conversation with my neighbour's son, outlining for me the lineage of the horse I was currently petting, and trying to figure out if I knew any of the horses in her line. I do. The first horse I ever saddled on my own was a distant realtive.

Thursday, May 11

Top five random people with mullets...

I know top five picture posts are not popular, but I couldn't resist.
1) This guy:

2) This guy:

3) This guy:

4)This family:

5) Bono:

Monday, May 8

Top 5 Rules for my Wedding

Inspired by yet another wedding on Saturday.

1. At no time will the song "I can only Imagine" be played. Ever.
2. The toasts will be limited to the best man and maid of honour, and some parents. Not every single person in the wedding party.
3. There will only be a "First Dance" if there is going to be dancing at the wedding. Because having the bride and groom dance, and then sitting back down is ridiculous.
4. Once my wife and I are announced at the altar, the song "Let's get it on" will be played as we walk out of the church.
5. There will be a live band at the reception, and it will be an 80's/90's cover band.

Friday, May 5

Top 5 Recently Purchased Songs on ITunes

1. "Runaway Train" - Soul Asylum
2. "Pictures of You" - The Cure
3. "Amy Hit the Atmosphere" - Counting Crows
4. "Start me Up" - The Rolling Stones
5. "Hell Yes" - Beck

Yes, the summer CD's are coming along quite nicely.

Top 5 good things about today so far (as of 7:30 am)

1. A year ago was 05-05-05, otherwise known as the day my life changed forever (for the best, in case you were wondering)
2. It is sunny.
3. I woke up early and sat in the sun, drinking tea and reminiscing. What better way to start a day?
4. My husband was so cute in his sleep this morning.
5. Tonight my apartment is being invaded and 10 junior high girls are spending the night. As crazy as it sounds, I am excited.

Thursday, May 4

Top 5 Things Otto has Learned from his Sabbatical so far

1. The bass guitar is a solid instrument, and a versatile weapon.
2. Sword swallowing is best left to the experts.
3. The ways of a woman are mysterious indeed.
4. The southern tip of Ontario is at almost the same latitude as Northern California.
5. Don't touch the oompaloompas.

Wednesday, May 3

Top 5 Possibilities to Explain the Disappearance of Andrew and Bryan

1. Together they have moved to a small Island nation and formed a quasi-communist resistance movement. Their stated goal: to restore the ideals of communism in their purest form. Their actual goal: Theocracy.
2. They are freeing Tibet as we speak.
3. They have moved underwater. Bryan is now the keeper of the Atlantic ocean, and Andrew the keeper of the Pacific. They travel by means of a futuristic submarine, a la "Nautilus".
4. Having both doubted the legitimacy of the Kyoto claims, they are currently exploring the polar ice caps to see if they really are melting. Andrew went North, and Bryan went South.
5. A fantastical journey to the center of the earth?

Tuesday, May 2

Top 5 Reasons I am not going to accept the new job

1. I found out that a friend of mine worked at the Marmalade Cat, and she said the managers were absolutely CRAZY! Hooray for intuition. I guess I should rely on it more.
2. Who wants to work for a place called the Marmalade Cat Cafe anyways???
3. I talked with my boss and she's not as mean as I painted her out to be.
4. Today we had a huge management meeting and things are going to get so much better. We're all totally on the same team now. It was funny, it was like one of those church planning meetings where everyone just connects. By the end, I felt just like we should all pray or something and devote our ministry of coffee selling to God (okay, I don't mean to be sacriligious, it just caught me as funny the amount of similarities between businesses and religion...i guess that is really not a good thing though and it makes me sad at the same time...)
5. 30% discount. How can I give that up once I'm an addict?!?!?!

Top 5 Reasons Jack Bauer Rocks My Face Off

Otto makes a good point. Thus, those of you who read the original post are lucky. You may brag to your friends if you wish. Since we don't want to spoil it for those who haven't seen last night's episode, I give you my replacement list.

Top 5 Women in Music who Could Defeat Terrorists with the Power of their Voices:

1. Mariah Carey
2. Amanda Marshall
3. Stevie Nicks
4. Rita McNeil
5. Avril Lavigne

Monday, May 1

Top Five Things I Did On My Flight Home

5. Looked for Jenn at the Abbotsford airport
4. Slept open mouthed next to a man
3. Slept open mouthed next to a airline host
2. Slept open mouthed while no one was on the plane
1. Cried.

*Kweller is sad*

Top 5 Post Grad Week Tasks

1. Get my voice back - 98% complete
2. Create a series of summer road trip CD's - 3% complete
3. Prepare for Youth Convention in mid-May - 42% complete
4. Get some sleep - 17% complete
5. Write Sermons - 1% complete

Top 5 Desired Areas of Freckle Growth

Summer is here, and as you may or may not know, summer is freckle season. Some people work on their tans. I'm a freckle farmer. Here's the areas I want to work on.

1. Belly freckles - always the hardest, but they're my favourite.
2. The face. Face freckles are a given, but I'm going for a record this year.
3. The Shoulders. These freckles make me look tougher.
4. Foot freckles. Another tough but rewarding area of freckle growth.
5. The back. Girls love back freckles . . . don't they?

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