Thursday, April 27

5 Reasons I'm not sure I want the job I've been offered

1. It's at a place called the Marmalade Cat Cafe/Scallywags. I hate cats. And marmalade. And what even is a scallywag?
2. It's run by an older english couple who seem pretty nice, but a little weird and quirky. I'm not against weird and quirky, but I want a good manager.
3. The pay is less than what I'm making now (not that I really care about money, but it is a consideration).
4. I wouldn't just be serving coffee, but preparing and serving food as well.
5. No more Starbucks discount. No more Starbucks atmosphere. Even though I hate my job right now, I do actually like working for Starbucks.

Oh, what to do? What to do? I wish NOW Canada would just hire me already!

Top 5 Reasons I want a new job

1. The shifts suck. For instance, today I started work at 5 am. Tomorrow I am at work until 11:45 pm.
2. My boss is a....not a very nice person. And not a good manager either.
3. My job is making me hate people - both the ones I work with and the ones I serve. I wanted to help out homeless people. I'm not so sure any longer.
4. There is too much stress at my store. And I'm not the only one that thinks so. About 5 core people want to quit right now. I think that says something. Stress does not equal less than $10/hour.
5. One word: Frappuccinos. Downtown, in the summer, in Kelowna. Need I say more?

Dan Kang's Top 5 Summer Jams

1. "Boys of Summer" - Don Henley. Dan also loves the Ataris cover version of this song.
2. "The Power of Love" - Huey Lewis and the News
3. "Addicted to Love" - Robert Palmer. Dan also really loves the Tina Turner cover version of this song.
4. "Girls just Wanna Have Fun" - Cindi Lauper
5. "This Much is True" - Spandau Ballet

Top 5 News

1. New World
2. New Order
3. New Car Smell
4. New England
5. Newton

Wednesday, April 26

Top 5 Aggressors

1. Germany - 1914 and 1939
2. Rome - circa 100 BC
3. Spain - 15th century
4. Soviet Russia - 1945
5. Langley - 2010

Tuesday, April 25

Top Five Favorite Summer Memories...

1. When it started to get all warm and sunny my mom would take me and my sister to Icecream Mountain for our first cones of the summer.
2. Going camping with just my mom for the whole week my sister was at camp.
3. Spending time on Saltspring Island with my now cranky auntie Gwen and going to all the trift stores and the market.
4. Camp Imadene... it was jsut all around great!
5. Swimming all day long at the lake!

.... i miss those summer days where there is not work, no school, no stress... nothing but fun and sleep and icecream.

Monday, April 24

Top 5 Reasons today was a wonderful day...

1) I wore a tank top outside, and I wasn't cold.
2) The sun was out for more then 10 minutes
3) Two words: flip-flops
4) When the early evening air starts smelling like freshly cut grass, nothing can bring me down... (except maybe a shark eating a puppy)
5) Loud Music, open window, empty road...

Top 5 Moments from the Wedding I went to this Weekend

1. All the Donkers brothers together at one event. What a devastating combo. The ladies don't know what to do with themselves. Also, for the reccord, my youngest brother Mark has dubbed himself "the most explosive Donkers." I would have to agree. Although we're an altogether explosive family.
2. Chocolate fountain.
3. Being a wingman for a good friend. And let me tell you, I was good. I got the conversation started, and then bowed out gracefully. I also deflected an interrupter. I had some help from Mark on this one.
4. Celebrating Brian's new girlfriend. And being the first to text message him a memo from the boss. RE: I love you.
5. The couple getting married were so cute. She was the smiliest girl I've ever seen. That was sweet.

Sunday, April 23

Top 5 Reasons That Me Going To Burns Lake Doesn't Indicate Me Giving Up

1. It is not for an indefinite or infinite amount of time. It shall serve the purpose of filling the gap between now and Desolation.
2. I will get to see and spend time with family-Grandma, Mom, Reine, Aunties, Uncle, Cousins.
3. It will be a chance for me to feel productive. Maybe paint the fence, do some gardening, burn brush piles, etc.
4. It is possible that I may be able to pick up some substitute teaching work. Income-a novel idea.
5. =with a bullet= Just because I'm in a weakened state doesn't mean I will give up. I am a strong, independant woman. I just need to figure out what comes next.

Thursday, April 20

Top 5 Things I would like to Dream about on Monday

The doctor said that whatever I think about before they put me out is probably what I'll dream about. So here's my list.

1. Playing drums for a huge show somewhere. Ideally I would be playing like Carter from DMB, only so much better.
2. Playing in the World Cup. Probably for the Netherlands, being half Dutch and all.
3. Exploring some awesome outdoor vista.
4. Flying. Without the help of a plane.
5. Living underwater. In the tropics.

Wednesday, April 19

Top 5 Homemade Meals I've eaten this week

1. Easter Lunch - steak. Awesome
2. Wait a minute
3. I haven't been home
4. For a meal
5. Since then

Tuesday, April 18

Top 5 Reasons Jenn Just Can't...

1) Deep, deep down, Jenn know's she'll loose...
2) Jenn's Mom is worried you will all kill her, or worse, hug her to death...
3) Guys, to be totally honest, Jenn is too shy, and when she's shy, she blubbers her thoughts, and once she peed her pants...
4) Jenn hate's losing...
5) I don't know if you all remember, but Jenn's a robot, robots can't eat anything other than oil and bolts...

Extra: One day soon my friends, one day soon...

Monday, April 17

Top 5 Thoughts I've had since setting foot on the island

1. As much as I want to be an "au natural", granola girl, I do want to live in a big city around a lot of people. I just want to do it differently than most people.
2. Why can't houses be as cheap (and the land as nice) as they are in the remote parts of the island???
3. Speaking of remote, I never realized how far and out of civilization the Comox valley feels, especially after living in Kelowna for a while.
4. Now that my sister, brother and I have all moved out, I expected the house to be a lot more quiet and subdued. I was most certainly wrong. We've been replaced by a german and a frenchman and tonight we had 11 people to serve for dinner. My parents are never going to settle down.
5. I don't care what anyone else says, the island is by far the most beautiful place on the face of the earth.

Top 5 Canadian Rock Bands

1. The Guess Who
2. The Tragically Hip
3. Rush
4. BTO
5. Corey Hart

Sunday, April 16

Top 5 Random Comments at Easter Dinner...

1) Grandma Jean: "We're so cute"...Grandma Louise: "Damn right we are"
2) Mum: "I know, Let's put the dog in the tuba!"
3) Cameron: "Oh, it's the Dutch family, they just play with themselves"
4) Mum: "Do you like the potatoes?" (500x)
5) Grandma Jean: "Those Damn teachers get paid too much anyway"

Friday, April 14

Top 5 Reasons Jenn thinks Dan is a Cartoon Character (A rebuttal)

1. He is excessively charming. Only a cartoon character could be as charming as he.
2. He has Archie-like freckles. Seriously, nobody can match Dan's freckle count.
3. He is cute like a cartoon character. Can I call myself cute?
4. His KD with bacon is SO good, it takes on cartoonish qualities of excellence.
5. Eat it Jenn.

Thursday, April 13

Top 5 reasons Dan thinks Jenn is a robot...

1) Robots are cool, and Jenn is cool, you do the math
2) Some robots are made of steel, I am the woman of steel
3) Although he's never seen it, I'm sure Dan knows I can do a mean robot dance
4) In old Tv shows's Robots always speak in the third person, Jenn does this all the time
5) Robot's can do multiple things at one make killer mac and cheese with tuna, and destroy gross mac and cheese with bacon, jenn does this all day long...

Wednesday, April 12

Top 5 Secondary Character Roles I Would like to have in an Archie Comic

1. The sporty guy. He's pretty popular, and he has a steady girlfriend. Does well in school, and he's pretty much got his life planned out. This guy has success written all over him.
2. The musician. Usually any musician in the Archie comics that wasn't a part of the Archies was a nemesis. But I think I'd be okay with that. I mean, how many times did Archie and his buddies run into "Bizarro world" Archie and his buddies? They all have their own little worlds. The musician usually has about 2 or 3 girls on the go. They can't settle down.
3. The nerd. Not the most desirable, but considering the inventions that Dilton came up with, I wouldn't complain. And obviously the nerd will eventually be rich and quite possibly save the world. Plus, Archie and his friends are always willing to help the nerd with his girl problems.
4. The guy. You know, those guys you never hear of, until one day Archie says, "Hey, there's my buddy Dan," like he's known him all his life. I think it would be alright to be that guy. He may or may not have a girlfriend, but he's probably pretty nice. And he may have some kind of talent. Like baseball or something.
5. The rich guy. Veronica is always falling for the rich guy. I'd be this guy just to woo her and rub it in Archie's face. Of course, I'd lose in the end, because Archie would come up with some zany scheme to expose my excessive vanity and win Veronica's heart. But really, I'd still be rich and good looking. And let's face it, Veronica is a bit of a hussy. I think I'd move on pretty quickly.

Tuesday, April 11

Top 5 good and bads about being home sick with the stomach flu along with your husband

1. You get to eat what you want whenver you want (though your choices are usually limited to soup or crackers and you get tired of those pretty quickly)
2. You get to miss work (but then again, today turned out to be my day off and the day I was going to do all sorts of things that I had to get done)
3. When you're husband is sick you have someone to be with you and sympathize with you (yet it's a lost harder to care for each other when you are both ill)
4.For once you have the time to sit down and just read a good book (but then when you have a piercing headache you can only read for a few moments before you must close your eyes again)
5. You get to boast things like the fact that you slept for a total of 15-16 hours in the past 24. (though I'm sure a boast like that makes you all wish you were in our place instead, huh????)

Top 5 Moments from the trip to Maine Island (remember that one???)

1. Lounging around like bums and listening to Allie read out loud from Lord of the Rings for hours on end.
2. Building a fort. Forts are great.
3. Exploring the treasures of the island from one entire end to the other
4. The rain, the rain, the rain. Doing what seemed like absolutely nothing for ever and ever and ever...ahh, it was glorious.
5. Hanging out in the convenience store. When you're on a small island, and everything is closed, you can always count on the convenience store.

Honorable mention: There was only one movie that was watched during that time...and something about it stands out in my mind as being creepy or very weird. However I fell asleep and don't really have any clear memories as to what it was.

Monday, April 10

Top 5 Memorable Moments from Spark

1. Trying to recruit 12 year olds for Bible College.
2. The horrific smell, and the seeming unawareness of every single preteen.
3. Re-enacting Sister Act with a miniature choir.
4. Getting kicked out of the worship hub.
5. Playing soccer with about 40 preteens all on the field at once.

Sunday, April 9

Top 5 memorable moments of Spark!

1. Seeing so many little, smelly people getting excited about God.
2. Seeing my preteens from the summer... I have never felt so homesick as when i found out they were there.
3. Trying my best to look cool at the Hip Hop dance hub... if you wanna see any sweet moves go ask someone else that was there.. i looked like a flailing monkey.
4. Getting to know the kids better... they are actually really amazing when you get past the funky smell.
5. Having three preteens order chicken strips at Wendy's only to discover they they were compleatly raw (one poor (dumb?) kid didnt realize that red juicy strips were a bad thing and ate two and a half of them)

Top Five Egyptian men I've met

1. The waiter on the cruise ship who always smiled bashfully at me and gave me free coffee. Is there any better way to my heart than free coffee?
2. Our tour guide Ahmed. He bartered for us, led us around like lambs, and near the end started referring to my mom as "mother in law"
3. The vendor who told me that I had the most beautiful eyes that he had ever seen. When I pointed out that I was wearing sunglasses and he could not in fact see my eyes, he replied without missing a beat "In my heart I know". What a salesman.
4. The giant chef who told me that I was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. When I said that he probably said that to all the tourists he replied "No, I never talk to the tourists". What a charmer.
5. The creepy driver who stared at me in the rearview mirror as we careened through the streets of Cairo. I thought we would probably die, because he actually wasn't watching the road.

Those Egyptian men love us white blonde girls.

Didn't make the cut: the group of about thirty college guys on some kind of field trip. After one of them asked for a picture with me, they all started lining up for one of their own. They missed the list because they were a group, though I think they were my favorites.

I have now lived my fifteen minutes of fame and can now get fat and ugly. Pizza here I come

Top Five Things I Believe Otto Will Do On His Sabbatical

5. Grow A Beard.
4. Help The Elderly Cross The Street.
3. Write A Novel Reflecting On His Experiances With Smelly Women Who Think They Are Fabulous.
2. Sleep.
1. Train A Monkey To Hold A Knife And Growl.

Saturday, April 8

Top 5 Reality TV Shows

1. Amazing Race - The people get to travel all around the world, plus it highlights the importance of someone being easy to travel with if you are going to be together. (incidentally, i think that i am great for travelling with, and would do very well on this show)
2. The Apprentice - The stakes are high (you can actually work for Trump at the end) and the people are generally intelligent and a little mean. That is just good entertainment.
3. Rock Star - well, Rock Star INXS was super cool; I don't really know how this new one will be.
4. Survivorman - OK, I have only seen this once, but, man, this guy is pretty damn cool. He just gets dropped somewhere, with the clothes on his back, and his camera equipment, and has to survive for a week without any further supplies.
5. America's Next Top Model - A guilty pleasure, but so much fun. Girls being bitchy to each other, Tyra being super cheesy, plain, skinny girls being dressed up and photographed and turn out looking good. Drama, drama, drama. I don't miss an episode.

Friday, April 7

Top Five Things I Would Like To See.

5. A Shark Without Teeth.
4. A Midget Giraffe.
3. A Blue Duck.
2. A Camel Smoking a Cigar.
1. A Monkey Holding A Knife.

Thursday, April 6

Top 5 reasons for my sabbatical from Stopfive:

1. I only have bitter and angry things to say about the world in general
2. I don't want to hurt or offend the Stopfive faithful.
3. I need to refocus my life. I am to overwhelmed by the futility of who I am
4. I'm not funny. Or, what I see as funny isn't.
5. I need to do something drastic.

I don't want to permanen tly leave, but I do need to take a break. I'll let you know when I want to return.

Top Five Toes

5. The little one
4. The one beside the little one
3. The middle one
2. The one beside the big one
1. The big one

Wednesday, April 5

Top 5 Fingers...

1) Thumb
2) Pointer finger
3) Middle finger
4) Ring finger
5) Little finger

BONUS - Chicken Finger...yuuuummmmm....

Top 5 BC Towns

1. Baldy Hughes
2. Stoner
3. Yahk
4. Vesuvius
5. Evelyn

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