Sunday, November 30

Top 5 Alcoholic Beverages

1) Lemon Meringue - cocktail at Earl's.
2) no-name - cocktail that Leo makes just for me at the Brickhouse.
3) Jailbait - cocktail at Deighton's Well. (I was there just the other night, and had this lovely cocktail. I also asked our lovely waitress when she was "due," fully believing her to be pregnant. Turns out, she wasn't pregnant. I blame the cocktail.)
4) Newcastle beer
5) Heineken (my staple)

Cocktails? What are you, a girl?

(Ha ha. Get it? Because you are a girl, Kelsey. You are! Man, that was so clever.)

Heineken was the first alcoholic drink I ever tried that didn't a) taste like urine (or what I imagine urine would taste like), and b) didn't cause more hair to grow on my chest (wow that was a disturbing mental image, even for me).

I've since discovered the wonders that are Granville Island beers. Hefeweizen is my favouritest ever. I love it. Like I love my dead grandmother (RIP grandma).

Of course, being a diabetic with a pansy liver, I'm limited to one, oh, every birthday.
Oh? I've never tried Hefeweizen. I think I shall. As long as it doesn't put more hair on my chest. Shaving your chest is a b*tch. I swear, it grows back faster than my leg hair.

Don't be ashamed of your pansy liver. You grow a good beard. You have nothing to fear.

DISCLAIMER: I am not a bar star or private boozer. I'm all for sobriety. Except when it comes to the Holy Spirit. Then go nuts. Get hammered.
Too late -- we've already arranged for the requisite Stop Five Intervention. Help is on the way, K-passa. Help is on its way.
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