Saturday, October 7
Top 5 Things I've Learned At Work These Last 14 Weeks
5. If you don't come in on your day off just to hang out, then you're a loser.
4. If you're not fresh, you're not Starbucks. This is equally applicable to both products and partners. Freshen up, Partners!...You know who you are!
3. Managers love watching overnight security tapes for their jollies more than Survivor or even Laguna Beach: "Oh God, it fell on the floor! Nobody saw that, right? It's just a little slimy, it's still good, it's still good! No one will know..."
2. Hookers are the new Supermodels. Adjust your expectations accordingly...try not to be too judgmental of those cadaverously skinny preteen girls. Stop laughing. Now stop crying.
1. Nine PM to five AM is the new nine to five. I know what you're thinking Stewart, but no, genetic engineering is not the new nine to five after all. Nine to five is. And I like it just fine...I'm not tired or mad at the sun at all.
4. If you're not fresh, you're not Starbucks. This is equally applicable to both products and partners. Freshen up, Partners!...You know who you are!
3. Managers love watching overnight security tapes for their jollies more than Survivor or even Laguna Beach: "Oh God, it fell on the floor! Nobody saw that, right? It's just a little slimy, it's still good, it's still good! No one will know..."
2. Hookers are the new Supermodels. Adjust your expectations accordingly...try not to be too judgmental of those cadaverously skinny preteen girls. Stop laughing. Now stop crying.
1. Nine PM to five AM is the new nine to five. I know what you're thinking Stewart, but no, genetic engineering is not the new nine to five after all. Nine to five is. And I like it just fine...I'm not tired or mad at the sun at all.
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