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5. At many points throughout the movie, battle is joined in a chaotic, bloody pukefest of gore and violence.
4. The movie is itself the story of 300 Spartans led by King Leonidas of Sparta who had to hold the mountain pass of Thermopylae against a raging horde of a million Persians commanded by King Xerxes, but just long enough to allow the main Greek forces to escape, regroup and make a stand on more favourable ground. These few Spartans chose certain death and changed the course of Greek history. Their story is, according to Wikipedia, a timeless "symbol of courage against extremely overwhelming odds." It stirs my heart.
3. Chaotic...Bloody...Pukefest...Of...Gore!!!
2. If my previous points haven't made you keen on seeing the film, then this should: "300" is being made by Frank Miller and is the film version of a graphic novel he wrote about the battle at Thermopylae (I can almost hear the grudging respect in your faces). If you're still being intransigent then you need to go watch Miller's "Sin City". Do it. Now.
1. Battle...Is...Joined!!! (inabloodypukefestofgoreandviolence)

Here's the trailer. It will blow your mind. I can't believe you still need convincing.
300 The Movie