Stop Five Records

5. Turn my room into a furnace with this little space heater. I like warming up and being cozy, but like the frog in the pot, continually fail to notice when it crosses the threshhold to sweltering.
4. Wash my face all the time. It always feels dirty and oily, even after I wash it. Perhaps one day I will be able to carry spare faces with me at all times and just switch faces when one feels dirty. The faces I'm not wearing will be in disinfectant.
3. Not eat meals. My roommate shares this strange non-habit. I do eat nutritional foodstuffs, sometimes as often as once a day, but whatever else I consume is purely recreational. I don't get people who eat regular meals. They frighten me.
2. Sleep on a pillow full of dried barley husks. It centers me.
1. Hunch my right shoulder more than my left one. They both hunch, but my right shoulder is reprobate, and it hates me. Call me 'hunchy'.

I could go on and on, but I think I've made my point: I do strange things.